Sunday 24 February 2013

Imma OWN the Seconds...

Just like that March is approaching. The March after her first March. 

Just like that there's a very pretty birthday party dress hanging in her wardrobe. Laying in wait with the tags attached. 

Her first birthday. Promptly afterwards will commence her first seconds. Her second spring. Her second Easter. Gone are so many of her firsts. So many of my firsts. We lived them together. Her first bath was the first time I bathed one of my babies. Her first smile was the first time one of my babies smiled.

I am working through the sadness and wonderment of "where did my baby go?" I find myself arriving at an easiness with it all and happy for it. I don't feel like a new mum anymore so I am happy to shed some of that title. The last year and 9 months have been a journey. A powerful one I am proud and privileged to have taken. If the first birthday milestone on this journey earns me some kind of "experience stripe" I'll happily take it and proudly wear it. It's too easy and opportunities are too frequent to feel guilt when parenting not to treat yourself to a proud moment!

Do I miss newborn "mip" noises? Endless hours of bleary eyed, dozy feeds and cuddles? Yes. But I wouldn't swap it for knowing what I know about her now. What I get from her now. Being surprised by random, uncalled for, crawl-by, sloppy kisses. She doesn't get older, she gets better. And how much I am able to absorb it now so much of that new mum nervy fog has lifted. 

I feel sure. I feel present. I feel confident and let no one wonder who's family this is... This is MY family. 

Bring on the seconds. Imma own the seconds. Not before a few sentimental tears on the 7th though... Obviously.
 

6 comments:

  1. Violet turns 1 on the 13th, we have her party dress hanging up and I have been making decorations. It is truly bittersweet. I miss my snugly newborn but I love watching her learn and grow everyday.

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  2. i cant believe how fast this year has gone. im trying so hard to think of her birthday as another one of the many 'firsts' and not the end of her first year. bittersweet is a great way to describe it!! x

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  3. Ahh what a little sweetie !!!! Love her little birthday dress...soooooo cute. Happy March Birthday Imma.........xx

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  4. Hey, I'm a new follower! Found you at TBH! You really have nice photos and I don't see any noise! Do you use photoshop?

    I'd love it if you can follow me back :)

    xoxo
    ochibernadas.blogspot.com

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  5. The dress is adorable! Reagan's first birthday was tough for me because it does mean that they are growing up. It happens too fast. Next you have a toddler on your hands and then it really goes fast!
    She is going to have a great first birthday!!

    Thank you for linking to Raising Imperfection.
    Please come back Friday to see if you were featured. :)

    ¤´¨)
    ¸.•*´
    (¸¤ Lanaya | xoxo
    www.raising-reagan.com

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