I shouldn't. Everything is fine.
Euna's back to good health. I'm fine. We're fine. Everything IS fine.
The only problem is that I am a habitual problem solver. I embrace change. Infact I LOVE change. Thrive on it. I always used to love the first day of the school year. I would spend the last two weeks of summer fantasising that my new hair, coat, pencil case, lip gloss, attitude... whatever, was going to change everything that year. I would come back to a new timetable, new classmates, new teachers and with my new hair, coat, pencil case, lip gloss or attitude and magically be this or that girl and EVERYTHING would be transformed.
Maybe this is why I LOVED becoming a Mum, because everything changed!
Now am I addicted to change? Maybe. Is change a crutch? Definitely sometimes. I have certainly been guilty of changing an entire situation when what I really needed to do was tackle a detail in a way that intimidated me.
Right now I need to stay the same. I need to do much the same as yesterday.
I have often wondered if much of the hard work in parenthood lies in the lack of novelty. Seeing your baby crawl for the first time is WONDROUS. Stopping her making a beeline for the toilet brush for a eighth time whilst I wee is not.
I need to inspire myself through small changes rather than big ones.
You could spout the same as marriage advice I suppose.
Persevere through the mundane and learn to NOT rely on change.
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